Seemed Like a Good Idea ...

This executive's laptop always fails during takeoff on the company's private jet. After the laptop checks out OK on the ground, IT pilot fish gets a directive: Ride up and down in the plane as many times as necessary to troubleshoot it. "After several takeoffs and landings, it was determined that the laptop had a loose wire that moved with the force of takeoff," sighs fish. "It cost more for testing than a new laptop would have cost."

Nice Try

Company policy allows only IT people to move PCs. So this support pilot fish is irritated when he eyeballs the reason for one remote user's network problems -- the cable is being crushed by a cubicle wall. "We moved the PC to the other side and then lifted the wall and threw the cable underneath and then reconnected it," user explains. Fish: Why didn't you call me to do it for you? User: "We didn't want you to have to make the trip out here."

Brilliant Idea

IT pilot fish is watching the shop during a big company celebration, when at 11 p.m. a call comes in: The server won't respond. Fish heads to the server room to check it out. "And it was about 110 degrees in there," fish says. Seems the celebration's finale included fireworks launched from the roof. "Engineering decided that the air conditioning would suck the smoke into the building," grumbles fish. "So they shut it off."

How Would They?

This CIO buys an electronic whiteboard for his office. When he leaves the company, the whiteboard is moved to the IT conference room -- but is never plugged in or hooked up to a PC. After six months and several attempts to get the board working, pilot fish asks technology manager what the problem is. "The power supply seems to have been lost during the move," manager says. "I'm pretty sure it will work if we find the power supply. We just haven't made it a priority, since no one really uses it."

Change of Plan

The plan: When the baby comes, this outsourcing pilot fish will turn over his projects, with updated notes, and take a month's vacation. The call, 11 a.m.: "Her contractions were mild and 10 minutes apart," fish reports, "so I told her I'd be home by midafternoon, as soon as I wrapped up the last of my turnover duties." The second call, 11:11 a.m.: "Her mother suggested I get my butt home right then, or she would be coming to get me," says fish. "I considered my turnover complete and told my boss so -- over my shoulder, as I bolted for the door."

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Copyright © 2004 IDG Communications, Inc.

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